Facebook Sends Warm Reminder To Publishers That It Is In Complete Control Of Their Livelihood
Internet · Mar 2, 2018 · BabylonBee.com

MENLO PARK, CA - Facebook, Inc. sent a personal message Friday to each publisher using its service, warmly reminding them that they are utterly dependent on the social media giant for traffic and that it is in complete control of their livelihood.

"Publishers are important to Facebook," the message sent to countless page admins read. "We want you to know that we care about you. Also, we will not hesitate to choke off your traffic until your organization ceases to be financially viable, should we feel the desire to do so at any time."

Mark Zuckerberg, CEO of Facebook, said the kind messages were the result of a new push to make sure publishers "know that they're valued, and also know their place."

"At Facebook, we're all about publishers. As long as they behave and believe properly. And if any one of them crosses me for any reason, or if I'm just bored or something, I am more than happy to starve them to death and bring to ruin every person involved in their pathetic little organization," a smiling Zuckerberg explained.

"Publishers complain about our power over them, but look, you're welcome to not use Facebook if you don't like our terms. We only control the flow of the world's information - no big deal," he added.


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