COLLIERVILLE, TN—While rushing out the door to make it to church within fifteen minutes of the start of service Sunday morning, local man Adam Lewis was reportedly able to shave at least thirty seconds off his preparation time by quickly locating his Bible in the exact spot he left it after returning from church the previous Sunday.
“It’s a real time-saver,” Lewis told reporters after church as he settled in to watch his favorite NFL team play. “When I used to be in the Word all the time, I’d leave it everywhere—you know, in spots all over the house, in my car, even at work.”
According to Lewis, since he instituted his new program of simply returning home from church and placing his study Bible on the hutch near his front door, he’s been showing up to church several minutes earlier, and he even finds more time for other activities during the week.
“I’ve almost finished the whole third season of Arrow, and that was in just one week,” Lewis said. “I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to run through all the seasons of The X-Files again with all my newfound time and freedom.”
Lewis may have found a real lifehack here, but he’s not done yet. The man states he’ll be asking the pastor if he can just leave his trusty copy of the Scriptures in the Bible rack in his usual spot near the backdoor, in order to save even more time Sunday morning and throughout the week as well.